A Lasting Legacy
by CBloom2
Summary: Why is it that Cal and Ethan never seem to be able to finish a conversation? Based on Saturdays episode with a small spoiler from next week's trailer.


**Ok, so why doesn't Cal and Ethan ever get a chance to finish a conversation? They started a bit of a deep and meaningful in the pub near the end and I was just waiting for Ethan to say something supportive to Cal when Dixie walked in! So, of course, fan fic brain took over and this small offering was born. I've used some of the dialogue from the episode, but I may not have got it quite right. Sorry it's taken a couple of days to post but I had to rewatch to try to get the dialogue basically right - oh the hardship.**

 **Slight spoilers for last Saturday's episode and a miniscule spoiler from the trailer for this weeks.**

 **As usual I own no-one that you recognise - they belong to the BBC.**

 **A Lasting Legacy**

Ethan walked into the bustling pub without any real purpose. Presently, he saw his brother sat at the bar hunched over his pint of beer. The younger man was immediatley on alert when he noticed the posture of his brother. He strode over to him, nudging him slightly as he stood next to him. Cal didn't acknowledge him straight away, so Ethan decided to start a conversation, "So...inspirational chap," he commented, talking about a patient that Cal had been treating earlier for a broken collar bone. The patient was only 21 and he had cancer and had been raising money for charity. For some reason, the patient, Matt, had really got to Cal but not for the reasons one might have thought.

"Yeah, he is. He called me a waste of space," he grumbled.

Ethan smirked, "Ah, Inspirational _and_ perceptive!"

His smirk, however, soon dropped from his face when he saw the hopelessness on his brothers' face, " I don't know my own home. I don't have a girlfriend..." Ethan nodded his understanding on that front.

"I don't have a social life outside of work, I don't even have a career plan! He asked me what I wanted...I couldn't even think of an answer..." Cal finished with a look of disgust on his face.

Ethan paused for a moment, completely taken aback by Cal's obvious despair. This was very out of character for his brother, and if he was honest, he wasn't sure if this was sitting right with him at all.

Before he could say anything else, Dixie walked into the pub to tumultuous applause, which Ethan joined in with. Once the noise had subsided, Ethan turned to finish his conversation with his brother, only to find the stool next to him empty. He looked round to see if Cal had joined anyone else in the pub, but he hadn't.

"Hey Ethan," Rita caught his attention, "Is Cal alright? He almost knocked me over leaving here. It looked like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders, which is not a look I usually associate with your brother," she smiled.

Ethan smiled back at her, but a frown of concern also creased his young features, "Thanks Rita. I think he's got some stuff on his mind, but you know Cal..."

She nodded knowingly as she asked if he wanted a drink. Ethan politely declined, deciding that he needed to find his brother, but he needed to make a stop first.

A hour later, Ethan arrived home. He let himself into the dark apartment, soon becoming aware of a dim light coming from the kitchen. After taking off his shoes, he lightly padded through the door, noticing immediately how his brother was sat stiffly at the table, his hands wrapped around a mug. On further inspection, Ethan noticed that the mug was still full of stone cold tea, so he gently removed his hands and took the mug away, "Do you want a fresh one?" he asked, hoping he could drag his brother's thoughts away from wherever they were.

Cal looked up, surprised to see him, "Huh? Oh...yeah...thanks."

As Ethan busied himself making some tea, he kept glancing at his brother. He had never seen his look this lost before, "Caleb, please tell me what's bothering you, maybe I can help?"

Cal chuckled mirthlessly, "There you go again. St Ethan, always wanting to help me coz I'm such a screw up!"

Ethan was shocked to say the least, "Whoa...that's not what I said. You just seem...I don't know...lost."

"I came home to get some peace and quiet, so I could figure things out, but I can't even get any peace at home!"

"So you do know your home," Ethan mumbled.

"Excuse me?" Cal looked puzzled.

"Earlier, in the pub, you said that you didn't know your own home, when it actually turns out that you do. I actually quite like having you here Cal..." Ethan smiled as he saw his brother's stiff posture relax a little.

Ethan placed the warm drink on the table in front of his brooding brother, "What's really going on here Cal?"

The older man looked up, "Why do I screw everything up Ethan?"

His younger brother bit back the urge to say 'how long have you got?'

"You don't screw _everything_ up," he replied, "I suppose you don't always think a lot of things through - you can sometimes have a tendancy to fly by the seat of your pants, so to speak, but when it really matters, like with mum, well you come through. I mean, come on, I wouldn't be here without you!"

Cal stared at his brother as he gently stroked the warm mug, shaking his head, "You were right you know, about Matt. I was jealous of him..." he dropped his head, ashamed to be admitting it, "He had a purpose in his young life, something to aim for and what have I got eh? I'm thirty three and I'm still a Registrar - I've no real prospects..."

"Ok now just stop it Cal!" Ethan said quite forcefully, "This is not you! Are you having some sort of mid life crisis early or something? You don't...wallow..."

"Matt said that he didn't want to disappear, to be forgotten after he died - he said that most people have a lifetime to leave a legacy...what legacy will I leave?"

"You save people's lives day in day out Cal. You make a difference every single day. I'm even lost without you. I bet you never thought you'd hear me say something like that, but it's true. You make a difference in every life you touch..."

Cal felt his eyes well up listening to his brother, "I don't think it's enough Ethan," he told him sincerely.

"So what do you want?" Ethan asked him gently.

The two brothers fell silent as Cal contemplated the question, "Can I ask you a question?" Ethan broke the silence. He took the lack of answer as an agreement, "Did you become a doctor because you wanted to or because I was going to be one? I don't mean to sound pompous, but when you had to retake a year in medical school, you could've dropped out and chosen a different path."

"I suppose to start with I thought it would be a great way of meeting young nurses, you know what I mean, but I love the job - I think I'm good at it, mostly..."

Cal suddenly jumped up from his seat, grabbed his mug and threw the contents down the sink, "I think I know what I want to do now."

Ethan sat waiting for an explanation, "Care to share?" he asked impatiently.

"I'm going to see Connie tomorrow and tell her that I want to work towards being a Consultant."

Ethan almost choked on the mouthful of tea that he had just taken, "Are you serious? Don't make rash decisions..."

"I'm not. It's the best of the best. I can truly make a difference once I'm a Consultant...I can do it Ethan."

He stared intently at his brother, daring him to disagree.

"It's a huge commitment Cal. There's no slacking off you know - hot date or no hot date. Hours and hours of studying and working...can you commit to that?" Ethan doubted that he could but he hoped that he would give it a damn good try.

"I'm not stupid Ethan! I can work hard when I need to...and I need to do this. This will be my lasting legacy...I'm ready for it," he finished with determination.

Ethan couldn't help the proud smile that graced his features, "You'll be brilliant Cal, of that I've no doubt."

Finally Cal smiled back, "Thanks for that. I appreciate it. Just one thing...will you help me study?"

The younger man chuckled, "For a small fee..."

 **So there you have it. The Consultant thing is from the trailer for next Saturdays episode. Cal will have to work super hard to become one and I'm hoping that we see plenty of supportive Ethan. Hope it was ok. Until next time...**


End file.
